Archive for October 21st, 2012

I Am

I am: yet what I am none cares or knows,
My friends forsake me like a memory lost;
I am the self-consumer of my woes,
They rise and vanish in oblivious host,
Like shades in love and death’s oblivion lost;
And yet I am! and live with shadows tost
Into the nothingness of scorn and noise,
Into the living sea of waking dreams,
Where there is neither sense of life nor joys,
But the vast shipwreck of my life’s esteems;
And e’en the dearest — that I loved the best —
Are strange–nay, rather stranger than the rest.
I long for scenes where man has never trod;
A place where woman never smil’d or wept;
There to abide with my creator, God,
And sleep as I in childhood sweetly slept:
Untroubling and untroubled where I lie;
The grass below–above the vaulted sky.
Written by:   John Clare
[In moments of quite aloneness, I used to take solace in the feeling inspired by the third stanza of this poem (the italics are mine and not present in the original).  Strange to say, I’ve never read the full poem until today when researching this entry.  Here again is the joy of the internet – to be able to find more beauty where one knows a gem already exists.    —    KMAB]

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