It’s Only Funny If You’re Old Enough To Know What “Film” Was

Everyone has a photographic memory;  some just don’t have the film.
—    Steven Wright
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On This Day In:
2022	Sowing The Future
2021	Unmistakable Progress
	Dom-De-Doo-Be Dom
	Reviewing Austen
2020	A Better Synthesis
2019	It’s Only Funny If You’re Old Enough To Know What “Film” Was
2018	Bourne Wicked Blonde
	First Things First
2017	This Explains A Lot
2016	Me Too
2015	A Proper Price
2014	Well Hard
2013	Because I Can
	Eloquence, n.
2012	Why Bother?
2011	Peculiar Notions

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No Wall And Not One Dollar

How you react when the joke’s on you can reveal your character.
—  Robert Half
[After two years in Office, Congress continues to refuse to fund a “wall” so President Trump declares a “national emergency” to divert funds from approved budgets.  When lies fail, steal.
The “sad” thing is, the joke isn’t ON #IncompetentDonald, he IS the joke.    —    kmab]
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On This Day In:
2022	Full Of It
2021	I’m Still Learning To Play
	What Are You Looking For?
2020	All You Can
2019	No Wall And Not One Dollar
	‘Cause It Makes Me Scratch
2018	Mirror, Mirror
2017	Keep On Keeping On
2016	Reflections
2015	Is It Time Yet?
2014	Ask Any Follower
2013	Cornered Or Surrounded?
2012	Escape
2011	Achievement
	Not Unreasonable Enough

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Easy To Tell

A woman came home to find her retired husband waving a rolled up newspaper round his head.
Wife:  ‘What are you doing dear?‘
Husband:  ‘Swatting flies – I got 3 males and 2 females‘
Wife:  ‘How on earth do you know which gender they were?‘
Husband:  ‘Easy – 3 were on the beer, and the other 2 were on the phone‘
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On This Day In:
2021	Our Common Humanity
	A History Story
2020	At The Very Least Smile More
	Your Touch
2019	Still Working On Both
2018	Two Jordans To Heaven
	Speaking Of #45
2017	All Greek To Me
2016	Judgment
2015	I Love Bacon, Too
2014	The Wee Bit
2013	Reading Rules
2012	Cadet Prayer
2011	Easy To Tell
2010	A NEW Lion In The Senate (Channeling Mr. Smith)
	Inception Redux
	A Quick Hit Of Stats

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K9 Humor – Has Anyone Seen My Setter?

The following is a short story I found on our recent trip to Oregon.  It was one of several sheets of paper handed out to hotel guests to amuse them while they were having breakfast…
A Seniors Trip To COSTCO
Yesterday, I was at my local COSTCO buying a large bag of Purina dog chow for my loyal pet, Biscuit, the Wonder Dog.  I was in the checkout line when the woman behind me asked if I had a dog.
What did she think I had, an elephant?  So, since I’m retired and have little to do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn’t have a dog, I was starting the Purina Diet again.  I added that I probably shouldn’t, because I ended up in the hospital last time, but that I’d lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.
I told her that it was essentially a perfect balanced diet and that the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry.  The food is nutritionally complete so it works well and I was going to try it again.  (I have to mention here that practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my story.)
Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food poisoned me.
I told her no, I stepped off a curb to sniff an Irish Setter’s rear and a car hit us both.
I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard…
Costco won’t let me shop there anymore.
The moral of the story:  Better watch what you ask retired people.  We have all the time in the world to think of crazy things to say.
[Postscript:  Just out of curiosity I googled this story and found dozens of references.  Not as many as I thought I’d find, so I guess this is a fairly recent story / joke.    —    kmab]
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On This Day In:
2021	I’ll Keep Trying To Anyway
	She Knows
2020	Respond
	Still Trying To Adjust
2019	The Limits Of My Knowledge
2018	Even Tiny Progress
2017	Real Conservatism
2016	The Business Of Life
2015	Alone Again, Naturally
2014	Agreed
2013	Smile From Your Heart!
2012	Like You
2011	Got Days?
2010	K9 Humor – Has Anyone Seen My Setter?  (Must read!!)
	A Longer Blog Than You Want To Read (Probably)
2009	Back and Forth and Round Again…

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